Kundalini Reflections


What can we become aware of? We can become aware of what is inside and what is outside, and how those dance together. There is infinity within and without. 

With the rise of social media, the information of which we can become aware is expanding rapidly. We can instantly become aware of atrocities all over the world. Our hearts can break in every moment for the suffering of our fellow human beings.

I, like most people, limit what I allow myself to become aware of in regards to the massive tragedies of our modern world, for the sake of staying grounded. I know that my nervous system can only take so much. 

I also practice Kundalini Yoga under the guidance of Holly Henty at Project Yoga Richmond in order to expand my capacity for awareness. It helps me maintain the health of my physical, emotional and etheric bodies so that I do not collapse into the sleepy, numb state of unawareness. 

This practice also expands my capacity to hold the dualities of life. For instance, Sat Nam: truth is our essence. Somewhere, before the birth of all things and after the death of all things, is an infinite source. And yet, out of this pure source, lies are also born. Our world is filled with deceit and misinformation. We exist simultaneously in the fabric of the truth of our essence, and also the relative reality of the physical plane that creates edges around bullets that tear flesh when they meet.

On May 25 our collective awareness was blown open with the death of George Floyd. The strength of my nervous system, bolstered by my Kundalini yoga practice, became more relevant than ever. I needed it in order to hold the pain and conflict that I saw and felt. As the movement for Black lives gained traction in our city, I could feel in my heart that I was called to join. I could not stay home. People were fighting for their lives on our streets and my heart was with them. To stay home would have been an act of deceit against my own Self.

I found myself standing face to face with riot police, and all I could think to do was pray. I don’t mean pray in the pleading sense, I mean to pray in the meditative sense. I put my hands together over my heart center, and I stayed with it. I could feel my heart, loving and breathing. I brought forth everything I have learned about staying present, and tuning in to loving awareness. I felt so scared, but I stayed in the awareness I have been cultivating for years.

I have been aware of myself transforming rapidly since George Floyd died. I’m becoming more willing to speak up, to show up, and to stand up for what I feel is right. It is not comfortable, but I practice yoga to stabilize the systems of my being, to create a safe space for the transformation to take place. It’s another duality. There is a grounding in my being that allows the shaking to happen. 

No matter which direction you look at it from, the already broken trust between the police and administration of this city and its citizens is deteriorating rapidly. Maybe your part to play, dear yogi, is not to go out in the streets on the front line. Maybe you don’t even feel yourself aligning with those that choose to protest. Maybe you do, and maybe I’ll see you out there. Whatever happens, I want to urge the strong hearts and hands of this community to maintain awareness. Stay steady. Keep peace in your heart, but don’t lose awareness of the moment. The humanity of this city is on the line, and while we are all infinite, we are also finite. We are human. This moment is real. This movement is real. We are real.

I encourage you to seek out raw footage and first-hand accounts of the protests. The following accounts continue to share valuable resources:

Richmond Transparency and Accountability Project
Justice RVA
Richmond Community Bail Fund
RVA Mental Health Solidarity

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